tired beyond recognition

in the history of my universe this, so far, has been the most tired i got. that rambling didn't sound as clearly as it should have. anyway, napakalapit na ng bar. i can almost taste the anxiety of the first sunday. unfortunately, my energy level took a nosedive 72 hours ago. the backpain got annoyingly persistent. the concentration got zapped by fatigue. the loneliness of weird sleep cycles outdid the hunger pangs by a mile. so, i try desperately to get back to "kill"mode.

i hope that happens soon enough, preferably after this blog entry. or after this edgy movie i'm watching. all it takes is a jumpstart, one moment of inspiration. and then life will be beautiful again. i hope that thing i last said could be half true, even for just a fleeting moment. right now, life is just mean and cryptic. "you know how life presents you with situations but they are not what they appear to be," it's been like that for a while. it's tiresome. whining is tiresome. but it sure helps in the unloading.

breaktime's over. i have to get back to studying. if i can't learn fast, i could at least try to learn well. i'd go with my own slowpoke pace and hope for the best. besides, the history of my universe says crap happens to everyone at some point. and that "the best things in the world are usually done by tired people".